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Showing posts from February, 2009

The Meaning of Life

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I dreamed of ships in rough seas making it safely to harbor. It’s my birthday. I can’t claim to be at the halfway point anymore. Considering how I lived my life so far, how I’m living it right now and how I plan to live the rest of it, I have serious doubts that I’ll make it to 98. If you’re searching for regrets between the lines you won’t find any. You won’t descry any deep sense of contentment either. I’ve missed numerous chances and grabbed a few improbable ones out of the blue. I’ve stumbled and stood up, many times. I’ve loved and failed, yet I’m in love again, forever. This post, however, will follow a twist early on. It is about me, about my relationship with the rest of the universe and my true meaning. A dear friend of mine, very close to my age, often repeats when under the influence: “ Only if I knew then what I know now .” I always answer jokingly, more under the influence than he is: “ Don’t get drippy on me. If I really knew then half of what I know now I would’ve c

Fijleet: Kingdom of Heaven

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After a full week of wind and rain, Friday morning broke out clear and warm at last. The thermometer on the balcony by the kitchen showed 19ÂșC. The sky was pristine, with plumes of rare clouds splashed sparingly around its turquoise canvas. I didn’t want to miss this singular February opportunity and I hurriedly showered but did not shave. I put on a fresh pair of jeans, a comfortable sweatshirt and an old familiar baseball cap. Within minutes I was looking at the cityscape through my rearview mirror. Ghassan Massoud Tartous was still asleep on this brilliant day. I was heading due east on the quaint road to Dreikish . I swiftly eyeballed the rudimentary map and estimated the distance to my final destination at 45, 46 km perhaps, significantly less than the 65 km indicated on one of the websites I’ve earlier browsed. On the road to Dreikish - A mosque in the woods When I finally got a chance to watch Kingdom of Heaven by Ridley Scott on DVD and in addition to enjoying this hi

Love Tag

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Mariyah appeared in the middle of the night. "Don't be alarmed" , she said, " it's just a tag . Tell me in 3 words, no more, no less. What would you like to receive on Valentine's day". Before I even mused my answer, she disappeared in the dark. Cliodna's perpetual emanation Fabulous sirens chanted within, luring me to forgo any struggle and drown. As I surrendered my senses I realized there was no way on earth I could've said it all in 3 words except the way I did. From Drop Box I tag no one... Happy Valentine's

Until You Came Along

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I have been running away from myself, eluding a personal confrontation in the midst of crowds or when perfectly alone. Even in the moribund moments between the vitality of cognizance and the languor before sleep I am hesitant to bethink my desperation. Time fleets by unwary eyes whilst dreadful little is changing over the years. Finite grains in a sand clock glide down uninterrupted… interminably. No divine hand shall intervene to flip the contrivance upside down when all the jots of my life are heaped at the bottom. I will go like those before me. No chance for an honorary encore. My legacy trivial once I lose my grip on consciousness for the very last time. From Monet Woman with a Parasol Until you came along. You filled all the desolate places, the forgotten corners, the inaccessible paths, the neglected memories and the forsaken dreams. I am a man who had trekked by the halfway marker before you egressed from the dense fog, who had crossed the point of no return while he waited f