The World According to Abufares of Tartous

Aries March 21-April 19 After having lived a life of sin and temptation, your health deteriorates rather rapidly. With the waning of the moon you are admitted to hospital. The costly ordeal devastates you financially. Just when you think you are getting out of this slump, you are hit by a runaway truck. Taurus April 20-May 20 You are in deep trouble. The Moon and Alpha Centauri are perfectly aligned in relation to the M33 Galaxy. Your life gets more miserable as you go on. There is nothing worth living for. Your partner leaves you, so will your parents, friends and neighbors. Shoot the dog before it bites you. Gemini May 21-June 21 May is obviously not your best month. You will be plagued by different problems at home. Avoid contacts with all humans if possible. Do not argue with your superiors or inferiors at work. With the present asynchronous motion of heavenly objects, it is very probable that you are going to get fired on Thursday the 3rd. Cancer June 22-July 22 One of

It was a tiring day in Damascus . After attending eight consecutive meetings, my Italian associate and I were bushed. At 9:00 PM, our last client was still arguing over pennies and cents. It was hard enough to keep my eyes open let alone argue with him. I just wanted out of there, a hot shower, a light dinner, a nightcap perhaps before calling it a day. In addition to the poor Italian and me, several other smartly dressed people were sitting around the huge meeting table, all subordinates to the bossy client. He was lecturing now. Surely he enjoys an audience and he was running on full steam. He was bathing in the adoring looks of his fans. He had fat and short fingers. I couldn’t take my eyes off his ugly hairy hands. I felt sorry for the beads of the expensive rosary coming in direct contact with his huge nails. There were so many reasons why I should hate the man and I was reciting them in my head. I don’t normally hate the filthy rich for no reason. I just loathe them when they go

What Famous Leader Are You? personality tests by similarminds.com Abufares, 1986 To Arima and all the wonderful ladies out there, apparently, I have the charm of JFK and the brains of Einstein . Or! Could it be the other way around? According to the online test this is the type of leader I am. According to a tartoussi , I have no leadership qualities or interests whatsoever. The only trait I share with JFK is probably my passion for women. As for Albert, I agree with him that " God does not play dice with the universe ". That obviously makes me more like Pepe Le Pew rather than either of them. I am tagging Karin, Dubai Jazz and Gray Fox with this one What Famous Leader Are You? personality tests by similarminds.com

W riting about politics is like paying a visit to the dentist. Well actually this is not a totally fair analogy. Some good eventually comes out of painful but necessary dental work. I’d rather talk about women, those who wouldn’t consider this type of introductions chauvinistic in the least. I’d rather talk about food and wine as well. But alas, “ les fous ” are everywhere. Their pictures smiling down at us from suspended banners, blocking our view of the congested alleys, streets and avenues, on every corner, every wall, every lamp-post and soon enough, popping up from between our legs, causing us to stumble further into our misery. They are playing a game of musical chairs. Hundreds upon hundreds of them, each and every one assing a chair in our venerated parliament ( assing a chair means that an ass is itching and eager to sit ). I present you with our distinguished candidates for the People’s Assembly . P olitics is a dirty game even in vintage democracies. The system itself suffe

One of the most exquisite pleasures in life is to be with or around friends and loved ones. At the end of the day, we close our eyes and fall asleep alone even if we share our bed with a partner. In our waking hours, however, we should always seek the company of those we care about. Only bitter experience teaches us, often too late, that we should’ve spent more time with someone who’s no longer here for us. They or we might move to another place or as is ultimately the case to another world. It’s very important therefore to cherish every second; to engrave on the walls of our memory a word, a phrase, a laugh; to always let them know how much we care about them. I had company a few days back. I was surrounded by friends and family, and I was the happiest man in the world (while it lasted). They graced and honored me with their presence. Such an event, unfortunately doesn’t take place often enough in these troubled times. Days later, we’re back alone or with the basic social cell that