Lady or Knight in Shining Armor

In writing this blog, I was at times propitious to get the initiative for my next post while in fact preparing the current one. But every once in a while, I run dry on ideas only to be saved at the last moment by something which may or may not be worth writing about. It’s naturally expected that the value of my posts fluctuates up and down. There are many variables involved, personal and universal, and they influence me as they do each and every one of you. I have repeatedly claimed that I enjoy listening more than I do talking. Of course it’s the same with writing and reading, and here’s my chance to prove it.

I've decided on the following scheme as far as this post is concerned. I want to have the pleasure of reading what regular or chance readers of this blog think regarding one specific topic. If it works out as foreseen in my head, my prelude is only a catalyst for the comment section which should be rich and colorful with your own contributions rather than mine. I kindly ask you to write whatever comes to your mind as an answer, with as few or as many words you may choose. I believe that this approach is a little more subdued than a direct tag. It’s even possible that I might not take part in commenting at all, although I wouldn't promise.

Perhaps the excitement of reading your reponses sweeps me completely and I would then jump right in. There’s of course the distinct possibility that it might turn out to be a total flop, but anticipation is among the purest of pleasures in life.

Would you please tell me about the man or woman of your dreams. What are you looking for in your ideal partner? What’s there inside, and outside, another human being that you truly love and find irresistible? Who is your other half?

If you'd rather answer 0n your own blog please feel free to do so. Just let us know by dropping a line in the comment section of this post so that we can all go and read it. You want to remain anonymous or use a pseudonym... it’s totally in your hands.


The Syrian Brit said…
Well!.. Trust you, Abu Fares, to get us to do the work, so that you can get the credit for it!!.. I thought that was MY trick!..
OK.. What can I say about the woman of my dreams?.. My 'Ideal Partner'?.. She must be fun to be with, and hard to be away from.. She must be clever, intelligent, and sensitive.. she must be beautiful in looks and in soul.. she must be charming in manners and in speech.. she must be very tolerent of my excessively long working habbits, and tolerent of my odd idiosycracies.. She must be a top-class mother for my children.. That would be the woman of my dreams..
But wait!.. I don't need to dream!.. I just have to open my eyes every morning, and she would be lying next to me..
Anonymous said…
AbuFaareeeees...!! Is this a mid-life crises, or are you starting a matching service...??!

If you are falling in love with our Princess of your last post, it is alright: half the Universe is ...the whole Universe should be...!! Why don't you describe her to us you imagine is harmless...and even Om Fares should be touched, if not even flattered...!!
Dr.Mad said…
Nice question, but I am not going to answer it because I don’t believe in the “ideal partner” thing :(, I believe in the “good enough” partner not the super/perfect one, maybe this is a defect of studying psychoanalysis ;). Anyway the main reason behind my comment is that amazing picture (not Harry Potter’s one), there is a very interesting story behind that Afghani girl’s picture, on this link you can see her pictured 17 years after the first one (, amazing how faces change but eyes don’t. I don’t know exactly what the point of this comment, I am just having a block of ideas so I can’t write any new post ;) and commenting on other blogs is much more interesting and intellectually stimulating right now.
Nice blog Abu fares and ta7ya Tartous !!

Unknown said…
@ Syrian Brit: *Applause* you are getting some extra French fries tonight at dinner.

Abu Fares, I have nothing in mind now, I just wanted my comment to appear in the top, lol...

Abufares said…
OK. I need to intervene here. So far, only Syrian Brit has answered the question and to a lesser extend Andre (Welcome to this place).
Naji, who's obviously going through a midlife crisis wants to project his condition on me. Why not, I'll agree. I might be going through a midlife crisis but am still interested in your answer to the question.
Andre, I always loved this picture and at the time it was originally published ( cover of National Geographic Mag) I was a subscriber. I have seen on NGC the episode when the photographer went back to Afghanistan and actually found the grownup woman all these years later. If I have an ideal woman (in terms of looks) she would look like the girl in the picture!.
RnD You'd better get your act together and make your contribution to society by answering the question.
Dubai Jazz said…
My dear friend Abu fares:
First of all I have to complement you on your selection of the photos, you never fail to fascinate us with the (semantic vs. syntax) combination of skills!
My contribution to this dialogue can’t be abstract, it can’t be grazed from its appendages, I have to touch down on several issues before giving you a straight answer.
This is going to evoke alot of forgotten memories, and open some old wounds. (I shall hold you responsible to all the consequences!) Ten years ago I would have answered differently, even five years ago it would have been an entirely different answer.
Throughout my childhood, I fell in love with actresses, figures and cartoon stars, one after the other, I loved Alice of the “Alice in Wonderland”, I adored Sandy Bill and I worshiped Mervet Ameen (metaphorically), I even had a thing for the former Turkish prime minister!.
And then at the university, the inevitable happened…I’ve stumbled and fallen in the puddle of long heart-aching love experience: she was nothing like anything else! she was so pure so innocent and so delicate. She resembled the morning dew on fresh daisy flower. Her face radiated a unique gradient of white shin, she looked like a sculpture from the Greece marvels, and yet she was so lively. She had this pitch-black hair, and deep black iris. A stark contrast, yet very very lively.
Platonic love?…..maybe…..
Not to dwell so much on how bitter it was and how badly it ended, so now I am grown-up (?), I can’t think of anything else really, the further I go in life the lesser I am bothered by the lack of superficial beauty. The fact that I can get a Beauty Queen for couple of hundreds of dollars in this town, makes it even harder to appreciate ostensible beauty. (please don’t be deceived by this statement, I don’t do hookers!)
So here I am, my dear friend Abu Fares. This is how I see it: I am going to spend the Valentine’s day alone and I am not feeling so miserable about it.
Maybe it’s the sweet anticipation that keeps me firm and calm? I don’t think it is the only reason…
Maybe I am being a narcissist? no, I am too ugly and too busy to be one!
in fact the ideal way to reflect my status is a song by Robbie Williams, and it’s aptly called “Angels”…I am not going to copy and paste it, I will type the lyrics as I remember them, hope it’ll be more meaningful and less pretentious this way:

Angels by Robbie Williams:

I sit and wait…..
Does an angel contemplate my fate?
And do they know, the places where we go
When we’re gray and old?
Cause I have been told ..
that salvation..
Let their wings unfold.
So when I am lying in my bed
thoughts running through my head
and I feel the love is dead…
I am loving Angels instead.
And through it alllllll,
she offers me protection
A lot of love and affection
Whether I am right or wrong
And down the waterfall
Wherever it may take me
I know that life won’t break me
When I come to call
She won’t forsake me….
I am loving angels instead….:)
Karin said…
What a GREAT post Abufares! You are asking a difficult question but I try to answer it to the best of my ability.
The man of my dreams, my other half ... well, one time my judgement failed already so I got VERY cautious. He should have the "special something", the certain wave-length which matches mine, MUST be intelligent, well educated, MUST be pro justice, compassionate, humorous, no coward ... should have MY kind of interests or at least compliment or/and understand and support mine.
He should be charming and have a warm smile ...

Outside? Well ... I can not see myself falling in love with a explicitely FAT man, and find it difficult to do so with someone who's shorter that I am (5'7"). He must be a nature-lover and enjoy the outdoors, ... I forgot to mention previously.

You know, it is more difficult to describe ... I either clicks - or it doesn't and if it doesn't right away - it won't in a million years!

Did all that make any sense? I kind of doubt it ...
Abufares said…
Come one, you are making all of us guys suffer an inferiority complex. If I catch the man of your dreams I'm going to strangle him with my own hands:)
Thank you so much for letting us know more about what the ladies want. So far you're the only one. I hope there' more...
Shannon said…
I've been thinking about this question all morning...and still can't seem to define the man of my dreams. I've tried to identify traits I want my knight to have, such as humor, intelligence, an open mind, and creativity. I've dated guys who matched every criteria I set forth, and still there seemed to be something missing. I think man of my dreams must spark something within me, must give me a feeling like I've come home and need not search for anything more. It's always nice to imagine him as tall, dark, fit, and handsome (holding a rose and glass of red wine, ready to massage my tired feet, etc etc), but it's more important that he causes me to laugh for hours, inspires me with his ideas, and supports me even if/as I make mistakes.

Lucky for me, I have someone who does just this!
Anonymous said…
Abu Fares your coment on Karin's post was out of place since you asked about the person of her "dreams".
Angel said…
Nice cleaver "tag" Abufares! ;)

To be honest, I could not describe my "Ideal/Dream" Knight better than Karin

"Mon chevalier idéal" ... let me think.... Intelligent, well educated, shares my interests ie: loves reading and travelling.....spark/ light a fire within my soul….honest, outgoing and live life to its fullest. "Special one" with a great sense of adventure....have room for me in his life, compassionate, always work for his dream and letting me be there to support it while seeking my own......loves me just the way that I am...Proud to have me beside him....

As a couple we should inspire each other to be an idealist and passionate, and make each moment memorable.....Share something deep and meaningful......

“Tall, dark handsome man with green eyes..... He shall always be my knight.......Standing tall in the midst of my dreams"

I could go on for years I guess but I will end it here for now:)
Anonymous said…
Well let's see:
He must be close but not too close as it might drive me away. Very good looking but yet with a clear physical flaw for the comfort of days when I might hate him (U can't love without hating).
Smart, cultivated but a weirdo in my own kind of way. I hate perfect, clear people.
A familiar stranger :as close as we might get, he still has to remain a stranger so that I could fill the blank about him with the ideals I want.
A sane pervert not affraid to reach for extremes in everything.
He should have a good sense of humour but not a funny guy:I don't need a clown (except maybe on some of his really sexy days, sex and a good laugh is not bad after all).
Someone who would always keep me longing for more and more of him, who knows the right dose a woman needs of his presence in her life.
I should "feel" he's mine but not "know" that! Spice up our feelings with slight and not serious doubts.
Well I can go on forever!Should I continue or is this enough?
Amr T said…
Love the food posts. yumm yumm
Karin said…
Hehehehe ... please NO inferiority-complex!! All I was refering to was a smart, charming guy who shares my wave length ... nothing more!! Too ambitious?? Naaaaaaaaaa ... ;-)
Abufares said…
What a bunch of exciting comments. I would say that after the feminine onslaught of openness, I, at least, find myself in the corner. Despite the valiant efforts of the Syrian Brit and Dubai Jazz, the women really outdid us fair and square.
A few notes in need of my attention. My response to Karin was more of a private joke (senseless in a way). But wait till you read the next stupid joke at the end of this comment.
Thank you Karin, Shannon, Angel and Lost Somewhere for giving us guys an idea of what you'd like to see in your partners and for making us aspire to have some of the qualities you so highly value.
By the way I'm neither dark nor too fair but I can easily get a tan. I am of average height (177cm) and my eyes are green (under the right lighting conditions). True, I'm not that fit, married and already way too old for most of you but I thought I give it a chance...
Finally, here's the stupid joke I promised you.

A man and a woman, who have never met before, but are both married to other people, found themselves assigned to the same sleeping room on a transcontinental train. Though initially embarrassed and uneasy over sharing a room, they were both very tired and fell asleep quickly...
he in the upper bunk and she in the lower.
At 1:00 AM, the man leaned over and gently woke the woman saying, "Ma'am, I'm sorry to bother you, but would you be willing to reach into the closet to get me a second blanket? I'm
awfully cold."
"I have a better idea," she replied. "Just for tonight, let's pretend that we're married."
"Wow! That's a great idea!" he exclaimed.
"Good," she replied. "Get your own damn blanket!"
After a moment of silence, he farted.
Anonymous said…
Now you are going somewhere... Great joke...!!

It is obvious that most of your audience would rather discuss shanklish than love... I threw you a pass, but you refused to run with it...!!?? I could have made a more profound contribution, I suppose, but it would not have fit the mold... It suffices to say that, if I am having a midlife crises, it is of a revrse type... I never grew up enough for the genuine thing... I never really dreamt about an "other half" or an "ideal partner"... I feel I am quite complete, but my biggest joy is discovering a new human being that fascinates me, that intrigues me...that I find woth my while to explore the unknown, the unimagined depths of, ...rather trying to fit her into some preconcieved image/mold, or to fulfil some unmet need (for needs always change with time!?)... wild romantic love and and escapades is all have known...all I continue to experience...all I continue to long for... that is probably what has kept me young and unmarried... or is it the other way around...!!??
Abufares said…
That's it Naji
All I wanted to hear was your own words. The mold is only in the minds of (some).
Your path is very likely the "What If" proposition that many married men wonder about. As long as you're having a good time in the deep sense you'll be one of the few who had baked the cake and ate it too.
I took your pass but was interrupted by half-time. I'll make good on it one day and write about "a few" dreams of mine.
Dubai Jazz said…
Thanks you Abu Fares for the joke, it’s hilarious !
Allow me to pass on some comments to your visitors...
@ Lost somewhere:
I am amazed at the volatility and whimsicality of some people, specially girls!
Now even when you ask them to describe their dream guy, even then, they would like to have some gaps and blanks to fill in later on with whatever their instantaneous fantasy dictates????!
…why can’t you just make up your mind right now? :)
Anonymous said…
I know I'm coming into this conversation a bit late, but nevertheless...

I dont think I have ever had one ideal guy in mind - the kind of guys that made my heart beat were so different at times. There were the serious guys, the funny guys, the smart guys (nope, no dumb guys), the head-stuck-in-the-cloud guys, the practical guys. Judging by the list, there must have been a million, eh? There werent that many, but those that passed through were a broad spectrum of personalities. I think the only thing in common in all of them is that they all had principles similar to mine.
Anonymous said…
Hello dubai jazz
I enjoyed your comment.
But as an answer to your question I was wondering isn't that why you love us?
Come on! Having an absolutely ideal guy in everything that's almost impossible (same for us!).And I wouldn't want that!
this is why I mentioned flaws, and this is why I left in him space for my imagination. We humans are rarely stable throughout our life in our opinions and tastes. This space could help him fit in. So you can call me a genius as I found the right equation for perfection! (...yet he's still hard to find ;) )

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